Stop the Propaganda!

The film John Tucker Must Die is wholly irresponsible. Do you realize that attempted murders of people named John Tucker have increased 350% since the title of that film was announced?

People often do exactly as they are told, and the men in their Hollywood clothes must realize this.

For example:
* When The Manchurian Candidate came out, Manchurians were elected into public office 3 times more often than in 'off years.' THIS ALSO OCCURED DURING THE RELEASE OF THE SNOOZER DEMME REMAKE!
* Cases are routinely put in the freezer every Sunday night, THE SAME NIGHT THAT COLD CASE IS ON CBS!
* Every time a Beach Boys song comes on, people throw their young boy children out the car window onto the beach, LITERALLY BEACHING THEIR BOYS!
* If anyone ever would watch Fox's The War At Home, they would literally begin shooting automatic rifles at home! Thankfully, NO ONE EVER WATCHES THAT SHOW BECAUSE IT IS UTTER CRAP!

And on and on.

To stop this madness, I have renamed my dog John Tucker. I have put him on a leash, unprotected in my front yard. PLEASE DO NOT ATTEMPT TO MAKE HIM DIE!