That's right, Hogwartophiles, the only reason your beloved book series sells at all is that all Level 12 and below Scientologists are required to buy 100 copies to give out for free on Hollywood Blvd.
It is no coincidence that Dianetics finally fell off of the New York Times best seller charts right when Harry Potter and The Sorcerer's Stone debuted. It's all a part of the plan, people!
PROOF!
J K. Rowling is an anagram for Growl Jink (a jink is one of those aliens that live inside you and make you fail personality tests.)
Hedwig the Owl is the same color as L. Ron Hubbard's bleached white skin (post yacht death).
The actor who portrays Ron Weasley will turn to Scientology as soon as he realizes there are no parts for him once the Potter movies end.
It is no coincidence that Dianetics finally fell off of the New York Times best seller charts right when Harry Potter and The Sorcerer's Stone debuted. It's all a part of the plan, people!
PROOF!
J K. Rowling is an anagram for Growl Jink (a jink is one of those aliens that live inside you and make you fail personality tests.)
Hedwig the Owl is the same color as L. Ron Hubbard's bleached white skin (post yacht death).
The actor who portrays Ron Weasley will turn to Scientology as soon as he realizes there are no parts for him once the Potter movies end.
And the final nail in the coffin!
Read the book The Secret. The 'Real Secret,' turns out, if you read the third letter of every paragraph, is that Harry Potter based on the real life wizard lover of Tom Cruise! Or maybe Travolta! (I admit I have not read the book.)
Without your precious Scientologists, your precious Harry Potter will have been read only as much as the Goosebumps series (which still is pretty good at the end of the day. Well done.)
1 comment:
Speaking as one of the motion capture actors in the Goosebumps CD-ROM game, I must concur.
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